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PTSD Isolation and Alienation

  • Writer: David "Joe" Sanders
    David "Joe" Sanders
  • Nov 14
  • 3 min read

PTSD has been the precursor for many suicides, and vice versa. But it doesn’t have to be. PTSD frequently drives people to isolate themselves, creating distance from friends, family, and the world that feels “normal.” Trauma introduced into someone’s life in any form can create the beginning of PTSD. Recognizing it and getting professional help sooner than later is the key to being able to live a fairly normal life. In my case, PTSD was not recognized until decades after the initial trauma. But isolation and alienation started immediately.

PTSD has been the precursor for many suicides, and vice versa. But it doesn’t have to be. PTSD frequently drives people to isolate themselves, creating distance from friends, family, and the world that feels “normal.” Trauma introduced into someone’s life in any form can create the beginning of PTSD. Recognizing it and getting professional help sooner than later is the key to being able to live a fairly normal life. In my case, PTSD was not recognized until decades after the initial trauma. But isolation and alienation started immediately.


I’m not sure in what location it would have been easier to recognize the problems I was having, at school or at home. Probably at school where there was an immediate drop in attendance and grades. I would have said at home where the problems were extremely obvious, but just after the suicide the entire household was going through their initial shock. Isolation started immediately at school. At home, there were always crowds. Neither one worked well for me. Whether it was a house full of relatives or a cafeteria full of kids, I always managed to find a way to be alone.

School and Home-life After a Suicide

I’m not sure in what location it would have been easier to recognize the problems I was having, at school or at home. Probably at school where there was an immediate drop in attendance and grades. I would have said at home where the problems were extremely obvious, but just after the suicide the entire household was going through their initial shock. Isolation started immediately at school. At home, there were always crowds. Neither one worked well for me. Whether it was a house full of relatives or a cafeteria full of kids, I always managed to find a way to be alone.


How “Did” That Work for You?


I didn’t want to talk to you about the suicide. I didn’t even want you to mention it. There was no way you could relate to what I had seen or what I had lost. In my broken state of mind, isolation felt like my only option. But how “did” that work out for me? It didn’t.  I built an alternate world where no one else existed, except for me and my brother. If you were unfortunate enough to try to step into that space, I probably ignored you completely or snapped at you. Over time, that world took over, and it was never going to end well for me. It took years to see that shutting everyone out didn’t protect my pain, it only made it louder.

I didn’t want to talk to you about the suicide. I didn’t even want you to mention it. There was no way you could relate to what I had seen or what I had lost. In my broken state of mind, isolation felt like my only option. But how “did” that work out for me? It didn’t. 


I built an alternate world where no one else existed, except for me and my brother. If you were unfortunate enough to try to step into that space, I probably ignored you completely or snapped at you. Over time, that world took over, and it was never going to end well for me. It took years to see that shutting everyone out didn’t protect my pain, it only made it louder.


The things I have finally found that are right for me is to talk about it, cry about it and try my hardest to prevent the same thing from happening to others. Suicides are going to happen, maybe a few less will happen because of my efforts to spread awareness. But the self-isolation that so many of us go through does not have to be a part of the aftermath. I personally believe that some immediate post suicide counseling would have made a tremendous difference for me. Probably even eliminated the need for my alternate world altogether.

What is the Right Route?

The things I have finally found that are right for me is to talk about it, cry about it and try my hardest to prevent the same thing from happening to others. Suicides are going to happen, maybe a few less will happen because of my efforts to spread awareness. But the self-isolation that so many of us go through does not have to be a part of the aftermath. I personally believe that some immediate post suicide counseling would have made a tremendous difference for me. Probably even eliminated the need for my alternate world altogether.


Moving Forward For me it involves no longer being silent. No longer hiding the shame of a family suicide. No longer looking the other way when I see others falling into that same trap of isolation. Always being willing to share what I experienced no matter how ugly it was to me. And always going the extra mile to help recognize and prevent future suicides.

Moving Forward

For me it involves no longer being silent. No longer hiding the shame of a family suicide. No longer looking the other way when I see others falling into that same trap of isolation. Always being willing to share what I experienced no matter how ugly it was to me. And always going the extra mile to help recognize and prevent future suicides.



 

**Reach out to me at any time. 

I am not only willing, but I also look forward to taking a share of your pain. Email: David@bondedabrotherslove.com. You will get a caring same day response.


Nothing scripted.   

You are not alone, and you matter.


Immediate assistance is available: National Suicide & Crisis Lifeline   📞 988 Veterans Crisis Line   📞 1-800-273-8255 (Press 1) | 📱 Text 838255 Survivor Support / Crisis Group   🌐 https://www.crisishotline.org  📞 832-416-1177

If You’re Struggling

If you or someone you love or know is in a dark place, please know you’re not alone and there is help available. Reaching out is a sign of strength, not weakness. There are people ready to listen, ready to walk with you, and ready to help.


Immediate assistance is available:


National Suicide & Crisis Lifeline  

📞 988


Veterans Crisis Line  

📞 1-800-273-8255 (Press 1) | 📱 Text 838255


Survivor Support / Crisis Group  

🌐 https://www.crisishotline.org  📞 832-416-1177

 


💡 If you know someone who needs to hear that they are not alone, share this story. Together, we can create echoes of hope that outlast the pain.


Bonded: A Brother’s Love — One Bullet. A Thousand Echoes.This book is more than my story. It is a voice for every family devastated by suicide and a lifeline for those standing at the edge of despair. My hope is that it reaches the one who needs it most. If even one person chooses life because of it, then every tear and every word will have been worth it. 📖 Order your copy today : https://tinyurl.com/3h87mjy6 and join me in breaking the silence. Together we can spread hope, honor the lost, and change the future.

For more than five decades, I carried this story in silence. Silence nearly broke me, but telling it is what keeps hope alive.


Bonded: A Brother’s Love : One Bullet. A Thousand Echoes my hope is that it offers understanding, connection, and even a reason to hold on when life feels unbearable.



📖 Order your copy today and join me in breaking the silence. Together we can spread hope, honor the lost, and change the future.


For more than five decades, I carried this story in silence. Silence nearly broke me, but telling it is what keeps hope alive. Bonded: A Brother’s Love : One Bullet. A Thousand Echoes my hope is that it offers understanding, connection, and even a reason to hold on when life feels unbearable. 📖 Order your copy today and join me in breaking the silence. Together we can spread hope, honor the lost, and change the future.

 
 
 

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